I went to the breast clinic today, they did a mammogram and ultrasound but couldn't get the biopsy part done on the same day because I'd had ibuprofen, and they want to do a core biopsy, and it's a blood thinner and the breast is very vascular, too much bleeding potential.

However, the Dr. says the biopsy is a formality they have to do, but benign or malignant, this lump has to come out. So I will be scheduling surgery as well.

My next appt. is with my family Dr. on Oct 26, to schedule the referral for the core biopsy and to schedule a referral to a surgeon.

Basically it's a matter of size when they get this big and are growing, they take them out. There are also two smaller lumps below the one big lump, and depending on the surgeon, I was told that they may also want to have those biopsied before doing surgery.

How much breast ends up removed and whether I will need reconstruction or implants will be something I will have to discuss with the surgeon.

My main concern is that the stress of surgery on my system will trigger a worsening of my FMS/CFS/ME and I'll have another downslide there. My last surgery, a hysterectomy, was actually a triggering event for the onset of my Fibromyalgia and Chronic Fatigue issues, there's a good possibility this could further negatively impact my illness. I'm hoping it will be a temporary flare up. However it's not worth the risk to leave it and not have the surgery. I'll just have to play whatever cards get dealt my way.

So, whichever way, whether it's cancer or not, I'm going under the knife.. again.

Who knows how long it will be after my appointment with my family Dr. and my surgery time, part of me hopes it's sooner, and part of me hopes it later, because I know that as crumby as I feel most of the time, I feel better than I have in a couple of years, and after I have this surgery, I may not feel this good again for some time.

I'll also miss my breasts as I know them now.

As for worst case scenarios.. no need to go there, unless there's a need to go there!