Temple Illuminatus

A personal story/what is domestic violence?

During-

the time when we are in a violent abusive relationship

We are blinded to the fact that it is the other person, whom is controlling us...

In our heads we feel sorry for him ( or her)....We want to ( help) fix them....

I love him so much he needs help!!

He is a wonderful man...... so loving but he's hurting... he had a terrible life.... I need to help him.... dont you see? to save him.....Yes he yells at me and puts me down i know, i know.... and i know its wrong...

But he cant help it...This is how he was brought up and he doesn't realize what hes doing...I need to help him.....

Ok i know i haven't seen my friends or family in a long time....

but the last few days have been so nice we have been getting along and i want it to keep going this way...

he loves when we spend time alone away from everyone...

ok so he hit me last night and this time it left a mark...

he couldn't help i,t he drank to much and he didn't mean it....

we both were drinking actually,

and i started in on him about that girl he was talking too....

and he got upset...and over reacted....

So really it was my fault for starting with him....

he said he was sorry..!!

he even cried all day.....said he will never do it again...

Today was a bad day....I just had found out our company is moving and i may loose my job

he wasn't to supportive of me.... he told me i was stupid...! and my life is a mess and i am out of control of it!....God i dont know what happened things have been so good and now hes just hating on me and putting me down!!! He even told me he was embarrassed of me!

I feel so depressed i dont even want to be around anyone anymore...

I'm starting to feel like I'm not good enough....

I feel so ugly....

We got into it last night again....i guess my insecurities got the best of me....

He didn't come home the other night and i felt he was with that other woman again...

gosh im really hurting today...yes we were drinking again...i wish we werewnt now because he was wayyyy uncontrollable ...He just lost it!

what am i going to do?! i cant be seen like this...! my face is all beat up and swollen

i have black eyes.....I cant even work??!!

i know this isn't right and its getting worse every time and i should leave him..but how will i survive alone??? I cant even keep a job?? no one wants me?! you know!!/??

i wont go to my family they will freak out if they see me then what? police ???

i know he hurt me but i still love him??! he cant help him self hes broken....and i dont want to hurt him more by pressing charges...I dont want to ruin his life i still love him yanno..

we have been together a long time its not that easy to let go!

and he has admitted that he needs help and will see a counselor..so we shall see how that goes....

It wont go so get out

((((( taken from my own personal thoughts, experiences of mine and those i know)))

remember help is out there !!

angelkyst~

what is domestic violence?

it starts with control.....

then with breaking the other

person down...so

that they become dependent on you

feel useless elsewhere

scared....

there are many faces of domestic violence

men and women alike

children even animals....

there is physical abuse, verbal

imprisonment , isolation......

but....

there is help and it starts with

breaking the silence

AngelKyst

(Dedicated to someone i love~)

some links below to look through~

http://www.echoforchange.com/get_educated_what_is_domestic_violence...

http://communities.washingtontimes.com/neighborhood/living-inside-o...

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by kyst on November 4, 2016 at 4:42pm

so true...sad as their stories may be ......abused as children...or growing up in home of abuse... being bullied their whole lives in school etc.......... once they become the monster that hurt them...and do the same to others..... there is no saving.... at least not by you alone...... and its best to walk away...before they do take you down, hurt you or even kill you.....

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